Rain! Gads how I love it, even if it leaves the skies overcast and gloomy. Angela and I have been out cutting shoots around the olive trees that line the western side of our yard between rain showers. There are five of them. We got the largest done a couple of weeks ago; three done today, and the last will have to wait until our big dumpster is emptied. Damp weather and hard work may not be the picture most folks see for a glorious day, but I do. I do because Angela have fun when we work together. There's a bit of kibitzing going on, along with a fair amount of "let me help with that," happening too. After all these years, we've got this job down to something of a science, so we work well as a team. These lovely trees are great shade trees, even though they are messy. They send up loads of shoots, and they drop olives for half the year. Yet I love them almost as much as I love gloomy, glorious days like today.
I also love working in my garden when it's damp out. I like the smell of the earth, and I like knowing I'm helping a plant grow better when I yank out a weed. It's nice to hear, "that' lettuce is really doing pretty well," from Angela too. This is the first year I've tried lettuce. We don't get much time for "cool weather crops" around here. Besides that, the rabbits, moles, gophers, and birds have a heyday in the garden too - not to mention ants and insects.
I guess I like being outside in general, unless it is way too cold or hot. We don't get many of the way too cold days, but we do get the hot ones. So, today was a perfect day. We got some of the rain we needed. We got another portion of a big job, the trees, done, and my small lettuce patch is weeded. I'm tired and happy. Now I must hit the grocery store before the kids come over for dinner. We'll have a nice steak, and we'll play with Brooke, and we'll catch up on what Aud and Daniel have been up to for the last week.
What more could someone ask from a gloomy, glorious day?
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Saved by the T!
Whew! Talk about being lucky, Angela saved the day again! Not only did she save the day, she saved our lives. On top of all that, she made us very comfortable as well! Okay, here's the story. You know we go RVing, and this past week was no exception. We had a lovely stay with the Rainbow RV group at Morro Bay. We had glorious SUN (which we don't see a lot of in Fresno), too much wind, just the right amount of wind, and perfect temps mid day.
The first day started out just fine except for a cold wind which pretty much ruined our evening gathering since it was outdoors. Because it was so windy, we pulled our 4 slides in (it was too noisy otherwise). When we did that, we noticed we had no heat in the front of the coach. After putting the slide in and out a couple times, everything was working fine again, so we went to bed. The next morning, Angela said she'd "worried through the night." So, she decided to "check it out." Good thing! What we had was a kinked gas line! I don't know if you know much about propane, but it's deadly - as is most gas when it gets out in an enclosed space. We hadn't sprung a leak yet, but because the hose flexed and kinked-depending on where the slide was, it was obvious it was eventually going to break/spring a leak/open a hole. Of course, it was Saturday, and we were in a small town we weren't familiar with. It was also 4:30 p.m. which meant anything open was likely to be closed in 30 minutes. Angela turned off the gas and set about removing the line. The RV folks told us of a local hardware store, and Angela dashed off to find them. The nice folks at this ACE Hardware (that's a plug folks) helped her get all the connectors and so forth. She was soon back to work replacing the whole thing, and redesigning how it would be routed so we wouldn't have the same problem again. After it was all said and done, she admitted, "I didn't think I'd be able to do that." That's a first for her! She can fix almost anything, and I just assumed, because of that, that she had worked with gas lines before! I was blithely unworried as I handed her tools and held the flashlight for her. As usual, though, she did a perfect job. So, she saved the day, our lives, and our comfort, as we'd have frozen our buns off if we hadn't had heat all night! She is a wonder, and yep, this is just another "Best Thing About Being Married to a T!" I am very thankful for her "can do" attitude, and her willingness to tackle new projects. Her mechanical abilities never cease to amaze me. She later said it was because she had so often replaced hoses on cars that she was willing to tackle this job without fear. Most of us "girls" don't have the experience with cars that most guys do, so again her "guy knowledge" came to our rescue - without the attitude though! Boy, am I lucky to be married to a T!
The first day started out just fine except for a cold wind which pretty much ruined our evening gathering since it was outdoors. Because it was so windy, we pulled our 4 slides in (it was too noisy otherwise). When we did that, we noticed we had no heat in the front of the coach. After putting the slide in and out a couple times, everything was working fine again, so we went to bed. The next morning, Angela said she'd "worried through the night." So, she decided to "check it out." Good thing! What we had was a kinked gas line! I don't know if you know much about propane, but it's deadly - as is most gas when it gets out in an enclosed space. We hadn't sprung a leak yet, but because the hose flexed and kinked-depending on where the slide was, it was obvious it was eventually going to break/spring a leak/open a hole. Of course, it was Saturday, and we were in a small town we weren't familiar with. It was also 4:30 p.m. which meant anything open was likely to be closed in 30 minutes. Angela turned off the gas and set about removing the line. The RV folks told us of a local hardware store, and Angela dashed off to find them. The nice folks at this ACE Hardware (that's a plug folks) helped her get all the connectors and so forth. She was soon back to work replacing the whole thing, and redesigning how it would be routed so we wouldn't have the same problem again. After it was all said and done, she admitted, "I didn't think I'd be able to do that." That's a first for her! She can fix almost anything, and I just assumed, because of that, that she had worked with gas lines before! I was blithely unworried as I handed her tools and held the flashlight for her. As usual, though, she did a perfect job. So, she saved the day, our lives, and our comfort, as we'd have frozen our buns off if we hadn't had heat all night! She is a wonder, and yep, this is just another "Best Thing About Being Married to a T!" I am very thankful for her "can do" attitude, and her willingness to tackle new projects. Her mechanical abilities never cease to amaze me. She later said it was because she had so often replaced hoses on cars that she was willing to tackle this job without fear. Most of us "girls" don't have the experience with cars that most guys do, so again her "guy knowledge" came to our rescue - without the attitude though! Boy, am I lucky to be married to a T!
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Happy Birthday to Angela
Today is Angela's Birthday - well, one of them. It's the Anniversary of her SRS. There were a few years when she celebrated her "real" birthday, the date she began hormones, the date she began to dress full time, AND the date of her sex reassignment surgery. As you might imagine, being a woman, she expected gifts for each of these occasions. I indulged her initially, and then I began to whittle down the dates until it was just two - her natal day, and her arrival day. After we retired, she elected to maintain only her original birthday, as that is when her family celebrates it with cards, letters, and gifts.
I can't, however, let this day pass, because it is important in ways far more noteworthy than merely a date on a calendar. Officially, for sixty years, she existed in the wrong body. She hid herself. She hid from her parents, siblings, relatives and friends, and then she hid from her wife and daughter as well as more friends and colleagues. She became withdrawn, depressed, angry, and more and more unhappy with each passing year. Finally, she confessed to me. She was sure I was going to leave her, divorce her, and take our daughter with me. She was sure she'd loose her family and all her friends. Instead, she found - and freed - her true self.
She became a woman somewhat gradually, starting out as a closet cross-dresser, and then, after her dramatic revelation, she dressed openly. We joined Tri-ess, got counseling, and discovered that Angela's belief that she should have been born a woman was real. We began to follow the Harry Benjamin Standards as we moved towards her SRS. We had the help of excellent professionals, particularly our councilor and psychologist, Sally Hunt.
Her surgeon was a marvel, and we certainly recommend Dr. Brassard from Montreal, Canada. His clinic and staff are wonderful, and his recovery lodge is delightful. We both wish all who make this transition an equally outstanding medical team.
Now, Angela is ALL woman! She wears blue jeans and sweatshirts sometimes, and she isn't always in heels. Inside her, though, she's dressed to the nines - or even the tens or elevens, if you ask me. The reality is that she is happy. She IS Angela, and she's all mine. If this transition hadn't happened in 02, we would have been divorced, and both of us would have been unhappy. We would have lost our soul-mate, and we would be without our true selves. We are individuals, but we are part of a team, a twosome, and we are a couple. We couldn't be happier.
Happy Birthday, Angela, I love you!
I can't, however, let this day pass, because it is important in ways far more noteworthy than merely a date on a calendar. Officially, for sixty years, she existed in the wrong body. She hid herself. She hid from her parents, siblings, relatives and friends, and then she hid from her wife and daughter as well as more friends and colleagues. She became withdrawn, depressed, angry, and more and more unhappy with each passing year. Finally, she confessed to me. She was sure I was going to leave her, divorce her, and take our daughter with me. She was sure she'd loose her family and all her friends. Instead, she found - and freed - her true self.
She became a woman somewhat gradually, starting out as a closet cross-dresser, and then, after her dramatic revelation, she dressed openly. We joined Tri-ess, got counseling, and discovered that Angela's belief that she should have been born a woman was real. We began to follow the Harry Benjamin Standards as we moved towards her SRS. We had the help of excellent professionals, particularly our councilor and psychologist, Sally Hunt.
Her surgeon was a marvel, and we certainly recommend Dr. Brassard from Montreal, Canada. His clinic and staff are wonderful, and his recovery lodge is delightful. We both wish all who make this transition an equally outstanding medical team.
Now, Angela is ALL woman! She wears blue jeans and sweatshirts sometimes, and she isn't always in heels. Inside her, though, she's dressed to the nines - or even the tens or elevens, if you ask me. The reality is that she is happy. She IS Angela, and she's all mine. If this transition hadn't happened in 02, we would have been divorced, and both of us would have been unhappy. We would have lost our soul-mate, and we would be without our true selves. We are individuals, but we are part of a team, a twosome, and we are a couple. We couldn't be happier.
Happy Birthday, Angela, I love you!
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Holidays End
I don't have a job to return to like most folks do, so it's my Job Jar that tasks me now. It's filled with all the things I was going to do, meant to do, and should have already done. My single New Year's Resolution is to actually get after all of those.
My main Going-To-Do-Job is to watch what I eat. I lost 35 lbs last year, and I plan that this year will result in a like loss (four stars to Nutri System, but I can't afford them now that I'm not working). I've stayed under 150 in '08, and my '09 plan is to get down to - and stay under - 135 lbs.
My Meant-To-Do Job was finishing the inventory of the house. I got all but three rooms done, this year, even though I promised myself I'd do the whole house. Oh yeah, I should add that I hope to add the garage and shop building WHEN I finish the three rooms that are not yet completed. My biggest problem with accomplishing the inventory of a room is there are too many"stoppers." You know what they are drawers filled with all the things I can't seem to throw away. Emptying them isn't as easy as I want it to be, but I promise to accomplish the task, none the less.
The Should- Have-Already-Been-Done list is the "just for me" things that should've been added to my daily living plans years ago: more time reading, exercising, and writing. Well, this is the year they are going to happen.
The good news is Angela will be supportive. I like that. The bad news is she'll pester me to do them. I guess I like that too.
My main Going-To-Do-Job is to watch what I eat. I lost 35 lbs last year, and I plan that this year will result in a like loss (four stars to Nutri System, but I can't afford them now that I'm not working). I've stayed under 150 in '08, and my '09 plan is to get down to - and stay under - 135 lbs.
My Meant-To-Do Job was finishing the inventory of the house. I got all but three rooms done, this year, even though I promised myself I'd do the whole house. Oh yeah, I should add that I hope to add the garage and shop building WHEN I finish the three rooms that are not yet completed. My biggest problem with accomplishing the inventory of a room is there are too many"stoppers." You know what they are drawers filled with all the things I can't seem to throw away. Emptying them isn't as easy as I want it to be, but I promise to accomplish the task, none the less.
The Should- Have-Already-Been-Done list is the "just for me" things that should've been added to my daily living plans years ago: more time reading, exercising, and writing. Well, this is the year they are going to happen.
The good news is Angela will be supportive. I like that. The bad news is she'll pester me to do them. I guess I like that too.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
If You're Happy And You Know It
I have to admit that I've noticed this year passing more than most because I've seen how our granddaughter has grown and changed over the year. (Watch any child and you'll see time passing before your eyes.) She's the delight of my heart, of course.
I don't mind the year passing, perhaps because it's been filled with good memory-making days. Brooke, of course, is first on that list, as are all the silly and fun things Angela and I have managed to get ourselves into. I've never mourned a year. I don't want to go back to any of them, even those I consider "the best." I'm one of those "onward looking" folks who drive others crazy. I like looking back at memories; I have lots of scrapbooks I look through from time to time even. But, they aren't any of the things that keep me going. I'm curious about What Happens Next. I want to know about the next great discovery in science and medicine. I want to see what new things Brooke discovers. We're are expecting a new granddaughter come summer, and I know I'll enjoy great times with her too.
I can't say getting older is any picnic, but it does have it's good things. There is more time to myself, time to try new things and do all those things I wanted to do, or should've done, through the years. I have time to spend with Brooke; I have time to go RVing; I have time to work on a memoir about Angela's transition and a fictional story too. I can sit and read a book, or take a nap, or write to a friend (yes, I still write actual letters as well as email). Most of all though, I can enjoy time with Angela. Although we've been married 42 years, I've wanted to know this new person Angela more and more. She's almost 9 if you count from her SRS (sex reassignment surgery), and you know how 9-year-olds are - a little silly, a little snugly, a little of all sorts of this and that. Well, that's Angela all over. She's into everything, way more than me, so I learn lots of stuff from her. I think I read a lot, but she puts me to shame. I read about a book a week; She's finished three. I read one magazine a week, and she reads three. She knows the news before it's news half the time. Isn't that great? Between Angela and Brooke, I don't have a chance to feel older.
Okay, there are a few more aches and pains around than when I was 20, but So What! I'm healthy, and most important, I'm happy. I love Angela, Audra, Brooke, my puppies, and all the rest of my family. I love to see what Angela and Brooke are going to come up with each day, individually and together. I love seeing Audra grow as a woman and mother, and I enjoy seeing her marriage grow. I love watching my puppies play, although I still miss Kathryn the Great more than I can say (she died in November), I love Snowball's Chance and Cassandra. I just plain love each day. I hope you do too. Happy New Year!
I don't mind the year passing, perhaps because it's been filled with good memory-making days. Brooke, of course, is first on that list, as are all the silly and fun things Angela and I have managed to get ourselves into. I've never mourned a year. I don't want to go back to any of them, even those I consider "the best." I'm one of those "onward looking" folks who drive others crazy. I like looking back at memories; I have lots of scrapbooks I look through from time to time even. But, they aren't any of the things that keep me going. I'm curious about What Happens Next. I want to know about the next great discovery in science and medicine. I want to see what new things Brooke discovers. We're are expecting a new granddaughter come summer, and I know I'll enjoy great times with her too.
I can't say getting older is any picnic, but it does have it's good things. There is more time to myself, time to try new things and do all those things I wanted to do, or should've done, through the years. I have time to spend with Brooke; I have time to go RVing; I have time to work on a memoir about Angela's transition and a fictional story too. I can sit and read a book, or take a nap, or write to a friend (yes, I still write actual letters as well as email). Most of all though, I can enjoy time with Angela. Although we've been married 42 years, I've wanted to know this new person Angela more and more. She's almost 9 if you count from her SRS (sex reassignment surgery), and you know how 9-year-olds are - a little silly, a little snugly, a little of all sorts of this and that. Well, that's Angela all over. She's into everything, way more than me, so I learn lots of stuff from her. I think I read a lot, but she puts me to shame. I read about a book a week; She's finished three. I read one magazine a week, and she reads three. She knows the news before it's news half the time. Isn't that great? Between Angela and Brooke, I don't have a chance to feel older.
Okay, there are a few more aches and pains around than when I was 20, but So What! I'm healthy, and most important, I'm happy. I love Angela, Audra, Brooke, my puppies, and all the rest of my family. I love to see what Angela and Brooke are going to come up with each day, individually and together. I love seeing Audra grow as a woman and mother, and I enjoy seeing her marriage grow. I love watching my puppies play, although I still miss Kathryn the Great more than I can say (she died in November), I love Snowball's Chance and Cassandra. I just plain love each day. I hope you do too. Happy New Year!
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
My transsexual nurse
It was my turn, I guess. I've always played Nurse Nellie when David/Angela managed to have any of his or her variety of accidents. They ranged from falling off a ladder - once as David and once as Angela; two heart episodes, again one as each; many bangs, bruises, cuts and gashes. I've been the one with the hydrogene peroxide, gauze, ace bandages, neosporine et al. I've also been the one who insisted, "We're going to the hospital on this one."
Yesterday was a gorgeous day, and there was no rain in the forecast for at least two days. It seemed the right day to spray the "No-Vegetation-Forever" weed killer. Our RV parking area was overgrown, and the sprouting vegetation in our driveway was forcing cracks open in the asphalt. So, I got busy. What I didn't do was pay attention to where my head was. Yep, I gave it a solid clunk on the corner of one of the RV room extentions. I assured myself of no serious injuries, and then I made several rude remarks to the offending corner and about my own inattention. I was soon back to work, however, although well away from the RV. Ten minutes passed, and then I noticed something dropping from my nose and then off my chin. I blinked away a bit of dampness on an eyelid, and puzzled, I reached up to see what the heck was going on. My forehead was covered in blood, and it was rapidly dripping down my face. I headed for the woodworking shop where Angela was putting together her latest project for baby Brooke - a desk/toy box arrangement. She took one look at me, grabbed my arm and headed me toward the sink. Due to previous accidents of her own, all the necessities were readily available. After a thorough washing out, hydro-peroxide and etc, she applied pressure to the top of my head and marched me into the house for further aid.
I'm happy to report that, outside of a gash about 3/4" long on the top of my head, I'll survive. She wouldn't even let me go back outside. She picked up all my stuff, and then returned to make me a cup of tea and hand me my book. "You're in for the rest of the day," she said. See how lucky I am to have my own T nurse around. She continued to check up on me through the afternoon, touching up any oozing, administering gauze and refilling my tea. What more could a wounded, inattentive person ask for? Yep, this is another Best Thing About Being Married To A Transsexual.
Yesterday was a gorgeous day, and there was no rain in the forecast for at least two days. It seemed the right day to spray the "No-Vegetation-Forever" weed killer. Our RV parking area was overgrown, and the sprouting vegetation in our driveway was forcing cracks open in the asphalt. So, I got busy. What I didn't do was pay attention to where my head was. Yep, I gave it a solid clunk on the corner of one of the RV room extentions. I assured myself of no serious injuries, and then I made several rude remarks to the offending corner and about my own inattention. I was soon back to work, however, although well away from the RV. Ten minutes passed, and then I noticed something dropping from my nose and then off my chin. I blinked away a bit of dampness on an eyelid, and puzzled, I reached up to see what the heck was going on. My forehead was covered in blood, and it was rapidly dripping down my face. I headed for the woodworking shop where Angela was putting together her latest project for baby Brooke - a desk/toy box arrangement. She took one look at me, grabbed my arm and headed me toward the sink. Due to previous accidents of her own, all the necessities were readily available. After a thorough washing out, hydro-peroxide and etc, she applied pressure to the top of my head and marched me into the house for further aid.
I'm happy to report that, outside of a gash about 3/4" long on the top of my head, I'll survive. She wouldn't even let me go back outside. She picked up all my stuff, and then returned to make me a cup of tea and hand me my book. "You're in for the rest of the day," she said. See how lucky I am to have my own T nurse around. She continued to check up on me through the afternoon, touching up any oozing, administering gauze and refilling my tea. What more could a wounded, inattentive person ask for? Yep, this is another Best Thing About Being Married To A Transsexual.
Friday, December 26, 2008
Holidays with a Transsexual
Again I know how blessed I am to have a T in the family. She's just plain tops in the kitchen! She can lift the heavy pots that I'd have to struggle with - like the turkey in and out of the oven, quickly and efficiently. She's great at carving it up too. Since I've retired, she's stopped doing all the cooking, which is fair, but she continues to do ALL, and I mean ALL of the clean-up. Now, who could ask for more than that?! But, even given that, she was in and out of the kitchen to help with this and that as I was getting prep done. She also always sets the table when we have company, even when it's just the kids. We had Daniel's folks over Xmas Day evening for dinner, so we had 6 for dinner, so there was plenty of cooking going on.
She's just a treasure with the gathering up of all the discarded wrapping paper and helping with keeping the various piles of gifts organized so we can get pics with each person and their gifts. Then she whips it up into bags so those who are away from their homes can take them easily. She's very organized without being anal about it. It's positively GREAT!
She's a good hostess too. She helped with all the falderal that goes with Xmas with guests. Almost none of that would have happened before the transition. He would have helped with the clean-up, and he'd have been "nice" to the guests, but, as I said above, the transition has made a remarkable difference. It's still fun to watch her interact joyously with folks, even after almost 8 years since the transition (Jan '01). She's also right in there with the kid and all her toys too! What an entertainer she is, and the two of them together are quite an act.
Anyway, I'm blessed to have a T in my life. If you have one, I hope you are equally blessed!
Happy New Years to everyone
She's just a treasure with the gathering up of all the discarded wrapping paper and helping with keeping the various piles of gifts organized so we can get pics with each person and their gifts. Then she whips it up into bags so those who are away from their homes can take them easily. She's very organized without being anal about it. It's positively GREAT!
She's a good hostess too. She helped with all the falderal that goes with Xmas with guests. Almost none of that would have happened before the transition. He would have helped with the clean-up, and he'd have been "nice" to the guests, but, as I said above, the transition has made a remarkable difference. It's still fun to watch her interact joyously with folks, even after almost 8 years since the transition (Jan '01). She's also right in there with the kid and all her toys too! What an entertainer she is, and the two of them together are quite an act.
Anyway, I'm blessed to have a T in my life. If you have one, I hope you are equally blessed!
Happy New Years to everyone
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